Be Kind to Yourself

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Often when we go about our daily lives, we get sucked into all the little details of our day and are in our own head – remembering to defrost meat for dinner that night, brushing your teeth, emailing your tax person, texting back your mom, finishing your homework, the list goes on and on.

While all these tasks are minor by themselves, together they amount to a significant amount of stress. It is only when we take a step back to assess all the things we are juggling that we can see how great we are actually doing. 

Many of us, myself included, push ourselves to add more and more to our plates, and having this full plate of responsibilities feels normal to us. While it is okay to achieve, you must cut yourself some slack and be kind to yourself – you are doing the best you can. We as humans are not machines, no matter how efficient we might think we are.

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The Juggling Act

The past several months have been very overwhelming for me. I was planning a COVID wedding, attending grad school, interviewing for full-time jobs, buying a house, being a wife, daughter, sister, friend…the list goes on. 

There were so many times where I felt like I just couldn’t stay on top of all my responsibilities, which often left me feeling defeated. I had a lot on my plate! 

It was only after assessing what I had taken on that I realized I was doing the best I could given how much was going on. And what was most important in this situation was to be kind to myself – I was doing amazing.

It is usually out of nowhere that I get that overwhelmed feeling as it has compounded from all the to-do’s I have put upon myself to complete each day.

For those anxiety-driven overachievers like myself, there are three actions I recommend taking when you get that overwhelmed feeling.

Step Away From The To-Do Lists

The amount of time I have spent reading and re-reading my to-do lists is embarrassingly high. When I find myself in that constant loop of reading these lists and getting stressed, I close my laptop and give my mind a break. 

Whether it’s going for a walk, meditating, folding laundry, unloading the dishwasher, or even just looking out the window, the only way to refocus my brain on completing the tasks for that day is by removing myself from the situation.

Engross Yourself in Something Else

I find that the best way for me to refresh my brain is by distracting myself with another activity. For example, calling a friend to hear about their day, reading a news article about something that interests me, or even watching a TV show all help me take my mind out of its current mode and provide perspective. 

I know that my line of work is not life or death, and therefore anything that seems devasting really is not that critical compared to the responsibilities of doctors or front-line workers.

Write Down Your Accomplishments

We, as humans, like to fixate on what we did not accomplish, what we did not complete that day, or what mistakes we made. It’s like that saying “no news is good news” – we tend to fixate on the negative, not the positive. 

Take some time to write down everything you have achieved that day, even if it’s simple. Something like not losing your patience with your family, eating a healthy breakfast, or remembering to grab an umbrella on a rainy day are everyday accomplishments that should be celebrated.

Even if we don’t see them, it’s just a matter of taking a step back to think about them.

Conclusion

Especially in the world we live in today – full of uncertainty, constant change, and stress – we are all struggling. It is important to remember that the only constant in our lives is change. So cut yourself some slack and realize we are doing amazing navigating something our world hasn’t experienced in a hundred years.

Remember to treat yourself with kindness! We only have one life to live so check in on your friends and family, say yes to trying something new, or even treat yourself once in a while. Actions like these, big or small, will take you further than you might think.

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