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Background

How old are you? Do you have a spouse/partner? Do you have any children?

I just turned 60 years old and have been married 37 years.  We have two wonderful boys, who are married to two wonderful women.

What part of the country do you live in? (ex. Suburbs of mid-Atlantic city, rural mid-western town, downtown west-coast city)

We have lived in the suburbs of a mid-Atlantic city for more than 30 years.  We like it because we are not too far from the beach and the mountains and we are central to a number of great cities.

How would you define “a rich life”? What does “living a rich life” mean to you? Can you provide any examples on how your definition evolved to what it is today?

A rich life is a healthy, contented life in which you know your family and friends love and support you. It means having the time and resources to do the things that make you happy, including spending time with family and friends, traveling to see how others live, and enjoying good food.  I arrived at what I believe is mostly a good work-life balance after experiencing a time when I was out of balance.  Work was taking too much of me physically and emotionally and I felt that I wasn’t doing a good job at work or at home.  I reached a point where I knew I had to focus on one or the other and I chose my family and home.

What are some daily/monthly/yearly habits that have helped motivate you to reach your goals and how have they produced results for you?

I need to make lists to help me accomplish my daily/weekly or yearly goals.  I find if I don’t have it written down, I tend to forget the tasks I want to get done.  Once I have a list, it feels good to check things off… and it gives me a sense of accomplishment.

Professional:

Business or Career part of life, aka your job

What are some habits that have helped you in your career/professional life? Can you provide some stories/examples of the habits?

I believe that I am very good at communicating with my co-workers and clients.  This has allowed me to be successful and advance in my career.  By developing good relationships, people know they can count on me.  If I have a slip-up I’ve developed their trust so they know I’ll make it right.

What are some habits that you wish you didn’t have during your career/professional life? Can you provide some stories/examples of the habits?

I wish I wasn’t a procrastinator.  I find that on days that I am busy, I get more done.  If I have a slow day at work, I think I have plenty of time to get things done so I put them off.  At the end of the day, I find I really didn’t get much done.

How much time do you devote to your career/profession (work)? What is your work-life balance like?

I work on average 40 hours a week.  Usually, I have a good work-life balance but sometimes it can tilt too much toward work if I have a busy week.  I went through a crazy busy period last spring when I worked way too much… sometimes 16-17 hour days. I was not happy… in fact, I felt angry about it. Once I got through that I vowed not to allow that to happen again. 

Family & Friends:

Those people you love unconditionally even if they drive you crazy // Like-minded people you choose to spend time with

How have you been able to keep healthy and long-lasting family & friend relationships?

I think I am a good listener.  I try to empathize with others and see things from their point of view. My father always told me to think about what I’m going to say before I say it.  I think this has helped me to avoid awkward conversations and potential conflicts.

Why have some of your family & friend relationships not lasted?

We grow apart when we lose the things we have in common or when we don’t make an effort to stay in touch.  There are people who I was friends with when our children were young and playing sports together.  But as the children stopped getting together, I lost touch with their parents.

What habits (actions done repeatedly) have you used to keep family & friend relationships going?

I try to reach out and stay in touch, even if it’s just a text to check-in.  Picking up the phone and having a real conversation is better… but after a long day at work that can be hard. We try to arrange times to get together when we can.

Physical

The body

At what point in your life were you the most physically fit? Why?

I believe I was the most physically fit while I was in my 50’s. I realized that if I didn’t get serious at that point, it would only get harder as I got older.  I made a real effort to exercise more, eat better and lose weight.  At this point, I had also found a good work-life balance and had more time to devote to self-care.  My children were grown and for the most part out of the house, so I was able to focus more on myself.

What was your schedule/life like during that time-period?

Since our children were on their own at that time, I had more time.  My husband was also away for work three days a week so I had more freedom to schedule time to exercise or go out with girlfriends.  I made a real effort to call friends and do things with them after work.  I took up yoga… and played more tennis.  I also was able to meet friends for dinner without feeling like I left my husband on his own.

What habits did you use during that time-period? 

I got into the habit of exercising before work, developing a routine that worked well for me. After work, I made a point of scheduling time to get together with friends… reaching out to them and not waiting for them to call me.

Mental

Intellectual and cognitive parts of the brain

Are you able to stimulate your mind as much as you would like? Why or Why not?

I feel like my mind is stimulated all day at work, so at night I kind of like to shut off.  In an ideal world there are things I’d like to read, or watch, or learn that stimulate my mind… or projects I’d like to start… but I find it’s hard to focus that hard on something after spending my day focusing on work.  Once I retire, I have a long list of things I’d like to do, and projects I’d like to try that will be stimulating.

What habits have helped/hurt you from being able to achieve your intellectual goals? Can you reflect on why you do these habits?

I don’t feel that I haven’t achieved my intellectual goals, but I tend to procrastinate and/or make excuses and that keeps me from accomplishing other goals.  I think I do this because, as I said, I’m so busy during the day with work that I just don’t want to focus that hard at something after work.

Spiritual

The soul of a person

How do you spend the time when you are doing things for yourself? How does each of these make you feel afterward?

Doing things for myself usually means exercising or being with my friends.  I exercise so I can feel good about myself, and reduce my stress level.  It’s also a chance to turn on the podcasts or music that I like to listen to.  If I’m playing tennis it gives me a goal to strive for and feeds my competitive side.  I want to get better at tennis so I’m motivated to play.  Another thing I do for myself is treating myself to a manicure, pedicure, and hair appointment.  Since the pandemic hit, I haven’t been able to get a mani and pedi for over a year.  I recently did and it just made me happy.  It felt like I had gotten back a bit of normalcy in my life.

What is your preferred practice to clear your mind?

Taking a walk either by myself or with a close friend really helps me to clear my mind.  If I’m by myself, I can think through things, go back through memories, and figure out how to move forward.  If I’m with a friend, we do “walk talk.”  We can share things that go no further than the path in the woods.  It’s a great time to get a different perspective on things that are bothering me, and know that it’s a safe zone.

Financial

The monetary situation

What habits do you use to keep your budget under control? What software/tools do you use if any?

We keep our budget under control by tracking what’s coming in and what’s going out on our computer.

How have you been able to increase your net worth? By earning/saving/investing more? How? Please provide examples.

We have always tried to live within our means and save for the future.  By not having the biggest, fanciest house or car we are now in a position where we can enjoy the fruits of our labors.  We certainly were fortunate enough that we were not lacking for nice things, but it didn’t have to be the best of the best.  It took a while but I think our children now have an appreciation for the way we brought them up… showing them that if you want something you need to save for it.

Conclusion

What habits have helped you live a richer life?

I’m not sure this is a habit, but I feel I live a rich life by being grateful for the people in my life and for what I have.  I try to never forget that things don’t always work out the way I want, and sad things do happen… but gratitude is very powerful.  It can lead you to be more positive… about your life, about the people in your life, and about the things that happen to you. So I’d say the best habit I have is… gratitude.