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This past weekend, two very passionate coaches let their emotions at the end of a basketball game get the better of them. These two individuals are highly successful in their profession but still displayed inexcusable acts of childish behavior.

At the end of the game, one coach was trying to delay the ending of the game even though his team was on their way to winning with 15seconds remaining. He was trying to help out his players by game-planning the last possession but the losing coach saw it as disrespectful.

Here is a classic case of miscommunication and misinterpretation of one person’s actions. At the end of the day, it’s not what you do, it’s how people feel after you do something.

Like I’ve written about since the very first post on this blog, people remember how you made them feel. It can be through your words or it can be through your actions. Since actions speak a thousand words, it’s usually actions that affect people the most.

When Passion is Helpful

Throughout a professional career, they have several moments when they have to push through the tough moments. This rings true for a professional athlete just as much as a professional executive who climbed the corporate ladder or a successful small business owner. Each of those people needed passion to get through a rough patch.

Passion can be viewed in different ways but I like to associate it with what makes people happy and excited to get up and do something with their day. Their passion can be painting, building something, playing a sport, or helping others. It all depends on what makes people motivated to do something.

Passion is the extreme version of motivation. It helps to focus people’s minds on one objective and think about nothing else. Passion is talked about all the time in the classic book, Think and Grow Rich by Napolean Hill. When humans are hyper-focused on a single goal, everything they see, hear, and think about is from the perspective of how they can achieve that goal.

When Passion is Harmful

Thinking about how everything in life is seen through the lens of that goal can distort people’s perspectives and thought processes. Someone could be asking a question or saying a comment that is completely harmless but can hit a nerve and people lose their cool.

Because of this hyper-focused mentality, they think about nothing else than how this one action or comment is meant to prevent them from achieving their goals. They can become offended if the action has occurred or is similar to something from their past. Either way, all sensibility is lost and a “fight or flight” mentality kicks in.

This is where people do things they wouldn’t think to do in normal circumstances. They say mean or cruel things back. They change their attitude toward the supposed offender. Or, like the head coach that was offended at the end of the basketball game, they resort to violence.

When Passion Can Ruin

Juwan Howard totally lost his mind and went crazy when the opposing head coach, Greg Gard, tried to grab him. Things escalated and he took a swing at an opposing assistant coach. Then others joined in and everyone became reckless.

Juwan Howard was an All-American player in college, played in the NBA where he won two championships and is currently coaching at his alma mater. He even won Coach of the Year last year!

Now after this passionate response to a perceived offense by the opposing coach, he has not only ruined his reputation, but the reputation of his team members, other coaches, and the school he represents.

Howard used his extreme passion to push his athletic career to the ultimate heights. He then turned his passions into a coaching career, giving back and becoming the best coach in college basketball at the school that shaped him.

Now it has all come crashing down because of a big red blot on his record. He will definitely be suspended for some time. He may even be fired. But is that really the worst of it?

Actions and Reputation

What people say and do say everything about who they are. We may not be public figures and televised for the world to see, but everyone that we associate with is seeing us with eyes wide open.

This can be a great thing as we can show them how passionate we are to meet our common goals. It can also be a terrible thing when our true colors show that we aren’t proud of. The best thing about that situation is we are not perfect, but we change for the better.

Be better people for each other. Communicate better because almost all conflicts can be solved by better communication. I am continually working on this and I hope you do too. This is critical for a Rich Life.